September 23, 2008
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TRAIN WARS
I like to sit in the very last car on the PATH train. I know the exact spot on the tracks where it’ll stop and I like watching people around me scramble to get rightinfrontofthedoor while I just stand there. Owned, guys.
With the exception of weekends, it’s also usually quiet on the PATH – on the way home, people are usually so worn out that it’s almost completely silent. I dig.
Anyway, the problem with sitting in the very last car is that there is a guy who comes onto the train every day starting at about 5:30 asking for money. He forces the door open for longer than it should be, yelling, “THIS IS THE HOBOKEN TRAIN! HURRY UP! COME ON! HURRY UP! HOBOKEN HERE!” and then walks around the train shaking a McDonald’s bag while people zone out and pretend not to notice him. His speech never changes – I watched a guy mouth it along with him after he walked by last week. He’s become a sort of tepidly lovable staple on the train.
Yesterday he had some competition.
A woman carrying a large Duane Reade bag boarded the train and started verbally accosting passengers who were in her way. “YOU DON’T TOUCH ME!” she said to a man who did not touch her. She pulled out a book and started proselytizing loudly.
One rider in particular was so annoyed with the loud interruptions that she began yelling over the two…
“I’m here with the Bergen-Lafayette Homeless Shelter…”
“You must acknowledge all things you do in the name of Jesus Christ…”
“SO ANYWAY, MY WINE TASTING…“I wonder who’ll show up tonight on the train. Maybe we can get a fun game of train-wide Mad Libs going.
Comments (21)
I love this post. lol i want to see them go at it. see who could make the most amount of change. Turn it into a reality show
Good heavens, that is one cool train.
@HuRtHateLoVe15 - LOL! I’d watch that show! XD
Human nature can be so interesting to watch. (:
sounds like the joys of city life.
Aaah public transporation…
There was this one performer that always got on the F train and sang the same exact song. I had never heard it before but after a couple of months, I could sing along. After about a year, he learned a second song and I was so thrown off at first. I haven’t seen him in a while now that I think about it. Maybe he finally realized that you have to either expand your repertoire or spread yourself out on different trains more.
I see the PATH has not gotten any better. LOL! Unless the new cars change the ventilation problem, the “end side” of each car has the better air ventilation as the air travels towards the back of each car…something you’ll definitely appreciate on those tightly-packed rush-hour cars.
I love the craziness on trains.
You have to love all of the insane-ness that is public transportation. It’s like free entertainment everyday. I love it!
I love subways wars, i don’t take the PATH, but I’d assume them to be nearly identical. They crack me up and make me feel bad all at once. My thing is, if you come on the train and sing/dance/play an instrument/do something using your God given talent…I’ll give you money. If you just walk on and expect some hand-outs thing again. Frustrating to see this guy has a schedule. They always start by apologizing “Ladies and Gentlemen, pardon the inturpution, I’m very sorry I have to do this, but…” and then it varies from my wife died and I’ve got to take care of the kids…to I’ve been searching for a job all day and all I need is money for food, or foot itself…
*sigh* new york living at its finest, i suppose, eh?
HADOUKEN TRAIN!
That sounds like cheap entertainment… The things I remember about NYC from when I was a child are the bums… I saw one in a suit when we walked behind him the whole seat was missing and his… BUM… was hanging out. lol
You could a do video blogs of your evening rides home. lol
you live in NJ? Aw.. that makes me love you even more
“He forces the door open for longer than it should be, yelling, “THIS IS
THE HOBOKEN TRAIN! HURRY UP! COME ON! HURRY UP! HOBOKEN HERE!” and then
walks around the train shaking a McDonald’s bag while people zone out
and pretend not to notice him. His speech never changes – I watched a
guy mouth it along with him after he walked by last week.”
I totally played that out in my head. Hilarious. You have a knack with imagery. Good stuff.
ah, public transportation. People watching may well have been one of my favorite things to do on the subway in NY.
Things like that would happen when I used to ride the city bus system. The central station seemed to be like a magnet for the mentally ill . . .
ps- seriously, always be careful…* Especially if you take it at night..it’s lonely on weekdays..except for a few odd ones..if you know what I mean…** take care**
@X_naomi_X - yeeeah, for now…but my roommate is leaving at some point to find her soulmate (ha), so i’m looking around . . . queens is looking like my best option at this point
lol the path train or any sort of train is funny especially when you watch people who have no idea what they’re doing on it.
btw where’d you get your profile picture?
Holy yikes.